Monday, December 04, 2006

My weekend and why I knit

This weekend was an absolute whirlwind. I don't even have any photos to post, because I never even had a second to think about the camera. First I left work a little early Friday to take the train into Manhattan to have dinner with my dad. He'll be traveling from now until after the holidays to it was important to meet up and bond a little. This meant I had the pleasure of battling with a NJ Transit 30 minute delay, the 30-50 mph winds and pouring rain we had Friday and trying to catch a cab during primetime. But it was totally worth it and was a lovely dinner. Saturday had more nuttiness-after a quick trip to the gym and shower, husband and I did a quick grocery shopping so we could get back home and make 2 full recipes of the rum balls and bourbon balls I've made in the past that he wanted to bring to the party we were going to in Brooklyn that afternoon/night. The party started at 3 p.m. and went probably into the wee hours of the morning, but knowing what I faced for Sunday we made it home at a reasonable 11:45. We had a great time hanging out with our friends but for some reason I had mindlessly spent most of the time standing in heeled shoes and by the time we got to the car that night I was pretty much working up a good limp. By Sunday I was already feeling the lack of sleep and crazy pace so I decided to be a slacker and skip the gym for sleep, just to get up at 8 a.m. anyway to get myself around and go over to my mom's house to help her with a bunch of stuff. She's in the process of moving so we spent the day lugging boxes to the new apartment, packing more boxes where she is now and going to what feels like 6 million stores to buy a whole bunch of stuff she needs. (The entire time I'm looking at the holiday decorations in the stores thinking, "Crap, I'm supposed to be doing holiday stuff right now too. Maybe I really should just admit defeat at this point.") I got home around 6 last night. Tried to make my house look a little less like a hurricane had hit it. Ate, and then at 8 p.m. Sunday night I finally sat down for the first time that weekend. Now by the time this sitting down point rolled around I was pretty much an absolute mess. Cranky. Tired. Miserable. Bitchy. Verry bitchy. For some reason busy weekends and me, we don't really get along. During the week is one thing. I expect my week to be busy, I'm at work 9 hours a day and after that there's not time for the rest. But when I get to 8 p.m. Sunday night in that state, and I'm thinking that in 12 hours I'll be at work bitching about Monday morning it's just not a good thing. I notice cat and husband start to look at me askance a little at that point.

But anyway, somehow I just decided to keep it together, watch some Amazing Race and knit a few stitches on my sock. And somehow, by the time I decided to call it a day around 10 I was feeling so much better. Just relaxed and focused and much, much calmer. It was a miracle! And when I noticed how much better I felt I decided it had to be the knitting. The one hour I got to sit down and knit just made me feel so much better, and changed my attitude and gave me such clarity. It's funny because I normally get pretty wrapped up in my knitting and what I'm trying to get done. It's like I'm Knitting with a capital K. And it's easy for me to forget all the other stuff. How soothing it can be. How it opens me up and helps me breathe and hear and rest. And it helps me let worry go and just slow down this crazy brain in general. This is why I knit. It calms me and makes me more human. It's just so funny that a little bit of knitting in my day can do all those things. It's such a simple, daily miracle and I'm really lucky to have it in my life!

Sigh... Now I just have to find some time to carve out for those Christmas cards or my relatives are going to be concerned....

4 comments:

Karin said...

I feel like admitting Christmas defeat myself. I wish you could hire someone to put up your holiday decorations for you.

Tracy said...

yes, yes and yes. I feel you, hear you, am there with you. now I must go catch up on so waaaaay over do blogging. where do people find the time?

Say said...

I know what you mean... I think that's why I just want to sit down and knit lately, quit with the studio and school work. I'm stressed with a capital S and need to relax. A pair of socks would do the trick.

Anonymous said...

Funny how this "wonderful" time of the year leaves us all frazzled! My husband has been keeping me "on task" during the week with two hours of cards, holiday decorating, ect. after work (at least he does half!) By the end of the second hour, I am awful. Then I get an hour of knitting to decompress and turn back into myself. Soon, I hope to be able to enjoy all this work! This was the long way to say - I feel your pain! And ain't knitting great!!